ze 123

i am letting mum and dad down like it's the easiest thing in the world... i have shortage of attendance in one subject and so i have to stay for two months here in the summer when they would prefer having me at home and i have to redo the entire subject all over again. and it costs like 7 grand!!!!!! i have been staying out a couple of times from the hostel which also i am not supposed to be doing really. mum and dad have pretty much been giving me everything i really need and i haven't been doing much to return the favor or even minutely appreciate it. i even missed final lab exam and i have no clue what i can or am supposed to do about it but its a very very very big issue, it is the finals after all... and to top it of, as much as i would like to not keep messing up over and over and over again i somehow seem to be getting really good at it. i have never failed so miserably at anything before, and i cant even seem to get remotely on track. this is not even bad, its beyond awful... i dont submit assignments at all sometimes and the ones i do give in are late... the entire point of me being here seems pretty lost if studying is not what i am doing. and i am doing nothing else either. probably just sleep and randomly aimlessly roaming about the place.. and the lab exam i didn't give.. i am amazing at that subject, or at least i think so. i don't know what to do. i don't think anyone does. i might randomly know what the right thing to do might be but i have no clue how to do it and i keep getting farther away from it than i could possibly get to it...

tell mum i love her ok?




love n luck

ze day before tomorrow

Hullo,

Its been a while.. Thank you for the prayers and thoughts... And when I say it's been a while, I barely even realized it's been 5 years, now that you mention it.. I think I remember the last birthday you spent with us and the farewell when you were quite upset to be leaving. But I presume, you don't think it's all that bad anymore and you probably actually like it there!
Well, I like it here too, but I don't exactly think I could say all is well with me. Been doing pretty horribly at college and barely even been going to class, and further, it doesn't seem to bother me so much, so then the situation is being taken even further lightly. No inspiration, motivation, determination, energy... At the moment, 4 years to study a course seems like its not worth completing in one sitting. Let's see how it goes and turn of events if any. Kind of a sad way to start a new year in a way but cant guarantee anything now can we so my birthday wish shall be one which cannot fail - I'll hope something works out, it always does, just how long it takes to get there is the question.


Love n luck

ze inception

It all takes work... So you either do the work or you get out!!


We are not looking for the meaning of life... We are searching for the feeling of life!





love n luck

ze end at the beginning

You held my hand and then you slipped away
And I may never see your face again
So tell me how do to fill the emptiness inside
Without love, what is life?

And anyone who knew us both can see
We always were the better part of me
I never wanted to be this free
All this pain, does it go away?

Then every time I turn around
And you're nowhere to be found
I know I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way I know
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew
To you, to you

From memory, there is no hiding place
In every crowd there's always someone with your face
Everywhere, trying not to care

Then every time I turn around
And you're nowhere to be found
I know I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way I know
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew

To you, I wish you everythin'
And all the best that life can bring
I only hope you think of me sometimes, oh
And even though I feel the pain
I know that I will love again
The time will come, oh, and I'll move on

I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you
Oh, I got a long, long way to go, got a long way I know
Before I can say goodbye, before I say goodbye
To all I ever knew, to all I ever knew
I got a long, I got a long, long way to go, long way to go
Before I can say, before I say, goodbye to you
Say goodbye, say goodbye
Oh, I got a long, long way I know
Before I can say goodbye to all I ever knew
Girl, I wish you the best I know, oh and all of the rest, to you
I got a long, long way to go
Before I can say goodbye to you




bye bye bye












love n luck

ze 31122010

Candy Floss... Filet o'Fish... Ice Gola... Cheese!!

Last sunset of the year 18.07hrs,

Home alone bringing in the new year with Gregory House. Fun ain't it...


I usually never see the sunset. Thought this year should be different. Thought I should actually get down to doing things I found really stupid and nonsensical quite pointlessly. The sunset was pretty good. The year will be...???????


This is my 24th post of the year!! The inverted number of my usual 42! Guess that would be pretty self explanatory of my year gone by! No words needed!






love n luck

ze coincidence

Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars? (Shooting Stars)
I could really use a wish right now (Wish right now)
Wish right now (Wish right now)
Wish right now (Wish right now)
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars? (Shooting Stars)
I could really use a wish right now (Wish right now)
Wish right now (Wish right now)
Wish right now (Wish right now)



love n luck

ze traffic lights

'I hate traffic jams'
'It's not a jam, the red light is on'
'I hate waiting, it makes no sense at all'
*pure silence*
*end of conversation*
*mind process: the implications of awaiting life*
*most traffic lights or stops are self created. self referring to the core of the human race. humans being logical beings probably reasoned out the requirement of such a discipline. so someone somewhere down the line thought that traffic lights were essential to everyday human life.*
*throughout our day we have decisions abound and each decision we make is either stepping on the brakes or pumping the gas. and since our day voluntarily or not consists of a lot of people we don't even seem to realize, passing us by, there are way too many dimensions to consider and to maintain to get through the day sane. Thus, the traffic lights are like time out signals, everyone needs a break, rest is inevitable.*
*though this is not the driving force somehow. everyone waits for the weekend, but no one waits for the traffic light. maybe its the way its marketed. maybe its the anticipation. maybe its the collision of dimensions. but what makes it truly different? the concept and logic seems to be the same, but why is it approached so irrationally and illogically? a mind set to be irritated with even the mention of a just-around-the-corner.*
*mind process adjourned. mind process experiencing logic system difficulty. mind process retiring for the day to embrace another with wisdom of 24!*





love n luck